There are some topics that shape people’s lives profoundly and yet remain strangely absent from workplace conversations. Menopause is one of them.
For many women, perimenopause, menopause, and postmenopause arrive during some of the most demanding and influential years of their careers. These are often the years when women are leading teams, running organizations, coaching others, caring for families, supporting aging parents, navigating transitions, and making big decisions about who they are and what they want next.
And yet, the physical, emotional, and cognitive changes that can come with this stage of life are still too often minimized, misunderstood, or kept private out of fear of being judged. That is why this special bonus episode of What’s Possible felt so important to me.
I was joined by two wonderful guests: Dr. Marni Carlyle, an OB-GYN physician and Chief Medical Officer for a large women’s healthcare organization, and Stella Grizont, a work happiness expert and author of The Work Happiness Method. Together, we had a candid, science-informed, and deeply human conversation about menopause, work, leadership, well-being, and what it means to feel seen and supported during a life stage that affects so many people.
This episode is a bonus conversation because it speaks most directly to women navigating midlife and beyond. But I also believe it offers valuable insight for coaches, leaders, colleagues, partners, and organizations that want to better understand the full human experience of work.
Because menopause does not stay neatly outside the office door. It can affect sleep, mood, attention, confidence, communication, energy, and self-perception. And when we do not talk about it, women can end up carrying those changes silently, wondering what is wrong with them instead of recognizing that they are moving through a real and meaningful transition.
What Menopause Can Feel Like
One of the most helpful parts of this conversation was Marni’s ability to name what many women experience in plain language. Menopause is often reduced to hot flashes, and hot flashes are certainly real. Marni talked about the impact of hot flashes and night sweats, especially when they disrupt sleep. But the experience can also include brain fog, irritability, agitation, changes in attention, vaginal dryness, skin changes, shifts in mood, and changes in energy.
For leaders, these symptoms can feel especially disorienting. A woman who has always been quick with language may suddenly feel like she cannot find the word she wants. A leader who has prided herself on patience may notice a shorter fuse. Someone who has always been highly organized may start relying more heavily on reminders, notes, and systems to keep track of what once felt automatic.
Marni was clear that women should not simply assume they have to tolerate symptoms that are affecting their daily life. Talking with a trusted healthcare provider matters. There are options, and there is more nuance in the medical conversation than many women were taught to believe.
What I appreciated most was the invitation to become curious rather than ashamed. Instead of asking, “What is wrong with me?” we can begin asking, “What is happening in my body, what support is available, and what do I need now?”
The Workplace Impact is Real
Menopause is not only a personal health topic. It is a workplace topic. That does not mean every woman wants or needs to disclose what she is experiencing at work. Privacy matters, and no one should feel forced to share personal health information. But organizations need to understand that symptoms like disrupted sleep, brain fog, hot flashes, irritability, and anxiety can affect how people experience work. This is especially true for senior women.
Many of the women I coach are in major leadership roles or meaningful transitions. They are carrying enormous responsibility. They are often expected to be clear, composed, strategic, emotionally regulated, and constantly available. If they are also navigating menopause symptoms without language, support, or understanding, the burden can be heavy.
Stella spoke beautifully about the importance of bringing the body into the conversation at work. We often talk about leadership as if it happens only from the neck up. But leadership also happens in our bodies, in our nervous systems, our sleep, our energy, our hormones, our capacity to regulate, and our ability to stay connected to ourselves and others under pressure. When we ignore the body, we ignore part of what makes leadership sustainable.
Surgical Menopause and Self Compassion
Stella brought a deeply personal perspective to this conversation by sharing her experience with surgical menopause after learning she carried the BRCA1 mutation. Her story was such an important reminder that menopause does not look the same for everyone. Some women move through a gradual transition. Others experience a sudden shift because of surgery, medical treatment, or other health circumstances. The emotional and physical impact can be intense, and it can take time to understand what is happening and what kind of support is needed.
Stella spoke honestly about mental fog, disorientation, and the challenge of feeling like herself again. She also talked about the importance of self-compassion. That word came up again and again in our conversation, and I think it may be one of the most important takeaways.
So many high-achieving women respond to change in their bodies by blaming themselves. They think they should be able to push through. They wonder why they are not performing the way they used to. They may feel embarrassed, frustrated, or angry that their body is asking for something different.
Self-compassion does not erase the difficulty. But it changes the way we relate to ourselves inside it. Instead of making ourselves wrong, we can begin to ask what is needed. Instead of measuring our worth by old standards of productivity, we can make space for a more honest and humane definition of success.
Medical Support, Self Advocacy, and Curiosity
One of Marni’s strongest messages was that women deserve informed, supportive medical care. That begins with talking openly with healthcare providers about symptoms and asking questions. It may include conversations about hormone therapy, non-hormonal options, sleep, mood, sexual health, exercise, nutrition, mental health, and other supports. The right path will vary by person, medical history, symptoms, risk factors, and goals.
What felt most important to me was not any single treatment option, but the larger message: you do not have to suffer silently. Marni recommended Estrogen Matters by Avrum Bluming and Carol Tavris as one resource for understanding how the conversation around hormone therapy has evolved. She also encouraged women to seek trusted advisors and professionals who can help them sort through their options.
Stella echoed that through her own experience of continuing to look for the right mix of support. Sometimes the first conversation does not answer everything. Sometimes the first provider is not the right fit. Sometimes we need to build a team of resources around us. That persistence is part of self-advocacy. And for many women, self-advocacy becomes one of the great lessons of this life stage.
Practical Ways to Support Yourself Through Menopause
This conversation also included very practical strategies for coping with symptoms and supporting well-being. Marni talked about simple physical interventions, such as cooling the room, dressing in layers, avoiding triggers like hot beverages when needed, and getting outside or moving the body in ways that feel enjoyable. These may sound basic, but they can make a meaningful difference in moments when the body feels unpredictable.
Stella shared how helpful reminders, voice assistants, and external systems became for managing tasks and reducing the stress of brain fog. I loved this because it normalizes something many people resist. Support tools are not signs of failure. They are wise adaptations.
If your brain is working differently in a season of hormonal change, there is nothing wrong with creating more scaffolding around yourself. Use reminders. Write things down. Build in recovery time. Ask for support. Notice what helps you feel more grounded.
There is also a leadership lesson here. Strong leaders do not become strong because they never need support. They become strong because they learn how to build the conditions that allow them to keep showing up well.
The Wisdom and Power of This Life Stage
One of the things I loved most about this conversation is that it did not frame menopause only as loss. Yes, there can be real symptoms. Yes, there can be grief, frustration, and adjustment. But there can also be wisdom, clarity, confidence, and freedom.
Stella and Marni both spoke about the possibility of this stage becoming a powerful pivot. It can be a time when women begin to question old definitions of success. It can be a time when we stop over-functioning, over-proving, or measuring our worth by constant productivity. It can be a time when we become more connected to what is true, what matters, and what we are no longer willing to carry.
So many women at midlife have accumulated decades of experience, judgment, relational wisdom, and resilience. They know things. They have lived through things. They have learned how to navigate complexity, care for others, lead through change, and make meaning from difficulty. We need that wisdom.
And yet, culturally, women can receive the message that aging makes them less relevant. This conversation offered a different perspective. Menopause can become a doorway into a more powerful form of relevance, one rooted not in youth or endless output, but in depth, discernment, and self-trust.
Actionable Lessons for Leaders, Coaches, and Organizations
What I hope leaders and coaches take from this conversation is that menopause deserves more understanding, less stigma, and a more compassionate lens.
If you are navigating this transition yourself, begin with curiosity. Notice what is changing without immediately making yourself wrong. Talk with a trusted healthcare provider. Seek support from people who will take your experience seriously. Experiment with practical strategies that help your body, mind, and nervous system feel more supported. And remind yourself that needing support does not diminish your strength.
If you are a coach, listen for the possibility that midlife symptoms may be affecting the leaders you support. A client who describes brain fog, irritability, sleep disruption, or sudden changes in confidence may not only be experiencing stress or burnout. They may also be navigating hormonal transition. We do not need to diagnose, but we can create space for clients to consider what is happening in their whole lives and encourage them to seek appropriate medical support.
If you are an organizational leader, consider what it would mean to make the workplace more humane for people in this life stage. That might include normalizing the conversation, offering flexible supports where possible, training managers to respond with respect, and creating a culture where well-being is treated as part of performance rather than separate from it.
The goal is not to make menopause everyone’s public business. The goal is to reduce shame, increase understanding, and make it easier for women to get the support they need.
Feeling Seen, Heard, and Supported
For me, the heart of this conversation is simple: women should not have to move through this stage feeling alone or unseen. Menopause is a biological transition, but it is also an identity transition, a leadership transition, and often a life transition. It can raise questions about energy, confidence, purpose, ambition, visibility, relationships, and what success means now.
That deserves tenderness. It deserves good information. It deserves practical support. And it deserves conversation. Marni’s hope was that women become more curious about their bodies and minds, and that they feel more able to talk openly with trusted advisors and healthcare providers. Stella’s hope was that women stop making themselves wrong and begin looking for what is right, their strengths, wisdom, and vision for the future.
I share both of those hopes. Because this life stage is not something to hide. It is not something to simply push through. It is not the end of relevance, ambition, or leadership. It can be a powerful moment of reconnection. And that, to me, is very much a conversation about what is possible.
